Most people who know me know that I am fascinated with the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), that personality test we all took in high school. Back then it was just a fun way think about what job I was best suited for, but the more I learn, the more I realize how helpful it is in understanding human interactions.
To quickly explain, the MBTI has four categories, each with two preferences. By taking a test you can determine whether you tend toward being an Introvert or Extravert, Sensor or Perceiver, Thinker or Feeler, and Judger or Perceiver. The first (I or E) is how you prefer to process information and renew your energy, internally or externally. The second (S or P) is whether you are detail-oriented and in tune to the world around you, or more focused on big-picture concepts and abstract ideas. The third (T or F) is how you make decisions, based on reason and valuing justice, or based on emotion and valuing harmony. The fourth (J or P) is whether you prefer structure and schedule or flexibility and adaptability in your interactions with the world.
There are sixteen possible combinations, and each combination of four letters creates a personality "type" that tends to view the world in a particular way. Some people are put off by the idea that there are only sixteen personalities for all of the billions of people out there, but in my experience, it has opened my eyes to the fact that there are fifteen ways of seeing the world that are completely different than mine, and within those are endless variations of individual preferences. It helped me to realize that people who think and act differently than me are not automatically wrong, they are just looking at the world in a slightly different way.
Case in point: my eldest son. My husband and I are alike in all but one of our preferences (Thinker vs Feeler, I'll let you guess who's who), but Max has only one letter in common with me! I am an INFJ, he is an ENTP, an Extraverted-iNtuitive-Thinker-Perceiver. In a nutshell, he wants to know ALL THE THINGS. His little brain is constantly learning and scheming and putting ideas out into the world, certain that he can improve upon everything that has ever been done. His bookworm mother who loves worksheets and alone time has a tough job keeping up with his constant quest for knowledge.
I have spent the last few years figuring out how to teach to Max's preferences, using hands-on projects, lots of space for creativity and open-ended exploration. Then his little brother got in on the game and I realized I have to completely re-evaluate. Lucian, I am fairly certain, is an ISTJ. He wants things black and white, and he wants to do what he is supposed to. He will sit for an hour filling out his workbooks, he loves games with rules, he follows instructions extremely well, but he gets very stressed out if there isn't clearly a right answer.
How in the world to school such different thinkers in the same home? It's an ongoing puzzle for me. Some days we do great, and they are both totally engaged. Some days one or the other is bored (or anxious) to tears. I hope that as they grow, they will keep each other in check and help each other to be more balanced. At the very least, they are set up well to get along with their college roommates someday, no matter how little they have in common! But I do know this: Whatever their differences, they are becoming the very best of friends. That is something they will always share.
No comments:
Post a Comment